Showing posts from May, 2013

my heart, my opus

it is time to tell you a story. this is a story about me. here is a hint: you already know most of the story. most of the story is about me being sad, miserable, depressed, long depreciative fugues, blahrghblarghblaargh etc.  from the very root of my root i have felt worthless and ugly and miserable and awful.  that is something that rings more true than anything else to me and it always has. but this is a happy story. it's a story mostly about a song.  incidentally, the song is called salve regina, and it was written by ramona luenguen. but that doesn't matter much.
chapter one: once upon a time i was in toronto and i had this horrible wave of suicidal thoughts and tendencies that just absolutely completely washed over me and everything that i am.  i wrote this poem at a cafe called the world is not meant for me and i meant every word of it:
the world is not meant for me beauty might be everywhere and stars might fall and trees might reach to the sky that might be blue that …

not myself today at work

so today is the launch of the partner's for mental health 'not myself today' campaign at work.  the campaign looks at opening up conversations about mental health in the workplace and reducing stigma.  they even have a 'not myself day' where people wear their mood on a pin! all in all, it's pretty exciting.
you can check out more about the campaign here:

i don't have all that much to say about this other than it's pretty exciting.
i'm a student. i've had small jobs and jobs for awhile but ultimately my main job is being a student right now and that suits me just fine.  sometimes i wonder how on earth i managed to get a degree while i was depressed.  most of my friends roll eyes when i say that, but i think of just how miserable i was and i seriously wonder how i kept it together enough to keep churning out papers for four years.  and i don't necessarily think it is a good thing - it probably would have been …